Since I’m not having quite enough of a difficult time committing to a blog posting schedule, balancing a side business and a “developing” business (“developing” is a nice HR-y word for “not working actor”), why not throw house hunting into the mix?! The past few weeks my Alex and I have been looking at homes. Our brains are crammed with new abbreviations: PMI (Private Mortgage Insurance) HOA (Homeowner Association), and LP (Listing Price) which is usually followed by a “WTF!” Here’s what I learned inn my 14 day old real estate venture:
1-You will have no idea what’s going on until the 130th time it’s explained to you. And then you’ll understand 65% of it.
2-If you made the mistake of getting a Liberal Arts or Fine Arts degree, you won’t be able to calculate the interest rate. Don’t bother. Let the mortgage guy who drives a BMW to figure it out for you.
3-If a house is made of gold, granite and marble, it still won’t be good enough to live next to the front yard of 5 barking rottweilers, two rotting VW Bugs, and one lawn chair (frame only).
4-You’ll now spend your Sundays at an Open House taking 15 pictures of 1 outlet in 1 room and telling the other people checking out the house that the owner did a great job removing the blood.
5-You’ll never make this work:
This post was originally published on Say Something Funny B*tch!
and before we went into escrow on a potential money pit, walked away from it and decided to plan a trip to Europe instead.