Words of Wisdom #1: John Mayer on Conan

Last night John Mayer wished Conan well on his last show before moving to the Tonight Show. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=to_Gcign6EU My thoughts exactly. I loved Conan's last show and it made me excited about good television again. His thank yous at the end were really touching. I used to watch Conan all the time and then I decided to spend 12:35-1:35 every night in bed, staring at the ceiling in an attempt to get a good night's sleep. Welcome to LA, Conan!

Camera Phone Files #2: It's what's inside that counts

I think Clara is teaching us an important lesson about real beauty.

LA Field Trips #2: Griffith Park

Yesterday I took my first LA field trip to Griffith Park. It's actually right across the street from my apartment. I thought I'd jog through the park until I realized it's all uphill, so it was more of a brisk walk. I didn't stop until I got to the top of Griffith Park and check out the Griffith Observatory.

The Greek Theatre. I couldn't get in there to take pictures of the amphitheatre. It's basically LA's Delacorte Theatre.

I know it's been years now and it's awful hacky joke, but the Governor thing is even weirder when see it directly.

Here's Griffith Observatory.

Smog and nature fighting it out.

It's exciting to look up from your everyday life and see such iconic image in real life. The Chrysler Building always did it for me in New York.

Camera Phone Files #1: Saddest Groceries Ever

Really? A jar of pickles, cheap light domestic beer, 2 Weight Watchers frozen dinners, a quart of milk, discounted Valentine's Day candy..and cuticle scissors because I found it distressing that I've been living for 3 weeks with no scissor options.

LA Field Trips #1: I've got..that Los Feeeliz-in'!

So here's my neighborhood. These pics from the two main streets in Los Feliz, Hillhurst and Vermont Aves. Most of my anecdotes are food and booze related. Of course.

Here's a little Swingers tour: Brown Derby and The Dresden.

This is where a Lychee martini did me in on Valentine's Day.

Skylight Books. I'm now part of their Lady Book Club for Ladies. First meeting is coming up!

Brunch at Fred 62 with Elyse marked my first celeb sighting, Andy from Weeds.

Yuca's. Mimi's favorite taco stand on Hillhurst. It's weird that they don't have chicken though.

A bad picture. I got faced on Rose with my friend Allison at Vinoteca Wine Bar on Valentine's Day. Now you can see why the Lychee martini was my downfall.

I went here with Mimi. The crab and shrimp enchilada was a good idea at the time but maybe catalyzed my oatmeal vomit moment in Echo Park the next day. Maybe they import water from Mexico City to be authentic.

This is where I waste my money and catch up on my Lady Book Club for Ladies reading assignment. I was also interviewed here by a local news station about Google's new GPS application.

Local News Lady: So what do you think of this new application by Google that allows you and friends to locate each other on your cell phones?

Me: Well, it could be really helpful since I'm new to LA. It could also be really helpful if I had any friends.

Camera Guy (after interview): Where are you from?

Me: I moved from Brooklyn.

Camera Guy: Oh. My daughter just moved to Brooklyn. Right near The McCarren Park. Do you know it?

Me: Did she take my apartment? Can she check in on Alex? Camera Guy: What? Local News Lady: Oh my gosh, I was born in Brooklyn!

Which further proves my theory that there are, at best, a dozen people who are actually from LA.

I have yet to go here but it sounds delicious. If it was called "House of Ruffles and Gin," I'd be a shift manager by now.

I've been living at this movie theater. Cause you feel less lonely when you're wondering why Kate Winslet won't just admit she's illiterate. I'm mean she's already a Nazi that watched 300 people burn to death and committed statutory rape. She's already pretty low on the social shame scale. Oh, sorry - spoiler alert.

Oh and He's Just Not That Into You: I wanted to like it. I liked it more at the end. For most of the movie I was watching a group of selfish idiots who happen to always be in front of amazing exposed brick. Is there really that much exposed brick in the Baltimore real estate market? I don't remember that from The Wire.

Here's the neighborhood expensive salad place, The Alcove.

The Griffith Observatory. Where the character, Plato dies in A Rebel Without A Cause and Paula Abdul's career dies in her Hush, Hush video.

I've been to Figaro about 731 times in the last two weeks. It's my new Juliette. The food or service isn't amazing and overpriced but it's nice to feel like you're in fake France.

Me (holding my Lady Book Club for Ladies book after seeing The Reader. See thoughts above): Hi. Dinner for one please.

Pretty, blond, tall, skinny hostess: Oh my gosh. Dinner for one. That sounds so amazing. Let's just see where we can fit you in.

(Proceeds to ask two couples to move over and seats me in the middle.)

Pretty, blond, tall, skinny hostess: There you go. You enjoy yourself.

Waitress: So just one?

Me: MY HUSBAND IS STILL IN NY!! So um, yes, just one. But two glasses of Cab.

Beats the palm trees on my shower curtain.

Your friendly neighborhood Scientology center.

And the Chabad House right next door.

More religion.

I think these are supposed to be weeds.

Okay. There's Los Feliz!

I'm not homeless

I've been subletting in Los Feliz for the past few weeks. Here's my street, Los Feliz Boulevard. It's like McGuinness Boulevard but pleasant. And not in Poland.

Here's the front of my building and the lobby. No, I didn't go into time machine and turn the dial to 1943.

Here's a few shots of the living space of the studio I'm subletting. I feel weird posting pictures of stuff and apartment that's not mine. I do actually have a bathroom, kitchen and bed. And those the flowers Alex sent me for Valentine's Day. Awww...

Two more pics and I'm done..Boozenog '09 will have a hutch!

There will be full display glory for this year's Boozenog. We just need friends in LA. Or enough money to fly New York in.

Porn for New Yorkers #1: Our New Apartment

I assumed if a state didn't have a "and this is where George Washington slept" anecdote that real estate would be shiny and sparkling. I thought California Native Americans carved their huts or tepees or whatever out of granite counter tops, stainless steel appliances and Toto toilets. Well apparently not. I sort of forgot that the Depression built Hollywood and since it hasn't rained here since 1929, crap sticks around. After spending two weeks looking at a lot of wall to wall dusty rose carpeting, shower doors with frosted swans, sinks shaped like sea shells, laundry rooms that should be equipped with rape whistles, fridge-less kitchens, or kitchens that look like they came off the set of Lassie - I found an apartment starting March 1! It's in the Angeleno Heights section of Echo Park, close to downtown. We totally got the recession special on a brand new, completely renovated, never lived in Spanish revival 2 bed, 2 bath, that sort of includes central air, washer/dryer, dishwasher, food disposal, french doors that lead to a courtyard, recessed lighting, hardwood floors. Okay, bragging done. Very excited! I don't know what to do with myself now - maybe I should get an audition or earn a dime somehow. Post script, 6/6/09: No our dishwasher isn't Smurf blue, it's a protective sticker.